A Man, His Doll, and Responsibility

Lars: I was talking to Bianca, and she was saying that in her culture they have these rites of passages and rituals and ceremonies, and, just all kinds of things that, when you do them, go through them, let you know that you're an adult? Doesn't that sound great?

Gus: It does.

Lars: How'd you know?

Gus: How'd I know what?

Lars: That you were a man

[...]

Gus: Okay, you know I can only give you my opinion.

Lars: That's what we want.

Gus: Well, it's not like you're one thing or the other, okay? There's still a kid inside but you grow up when you decide to do right, okay, and not what's right for you, what's right for everybody, even when it hurts.

Lars: Okay, like what?

Gus: Like, you know, like, you don't jerk people around, you know, and you don't cheat on your woman, and you take care of your family, you know, and you admit when you're wrong, or you try to, anyways. That's all I can think of, you know -- it sounds like it's easy and for some reason it's not.

Lars and the Real Girl

You wouldn't think that a movie about a man and a life-size, anatomically correct sex doll would be described as charming, heart-warming, and delightful but Lars and the Real Girl pulls it off.

Lars suffers from crippling shyness and an extreme desire to be alone, to the extent that even enduring dinner with his brother and sister-in-law is a severe trial to all concerned. Six weeks after his cubicle-mate shows him a life-size sex doll, Lars' new girlfriend "Bianca" shows up and is treated as real, to the natural alarm of his family. The town doctor advises that sometimes such severely dysfunctional behavior is a way to work through problems and tells them that they should also treat Bianca as real. She then prescribes a weekly series of "treatments" for Bianca's "low blood pressure" which give her the needed excuse to talk with Lars and try to help him work out his problems. For those worried about the fact that Bianca's original manufacture was for unnatural purposes, Lars' faith is very important to him, and, therefore, to Bianca who is given a spare bedroom at his brother's house.

The tale that emerges borders on the edge of fantasy, just as does The Castle, another small film that takes a fantastic premise and uses it to show a bigger picture. In the case of The Castle it is the strength of family love. In the case of Lars and the Real Girl, it is exemplified in the exchange excerpted above between Lars and his brother. Gus must come to terms with how his past choices have affected Lars and take responsibility. Lars uses Bianca not only as a shield from the world which terrifies him but also as a way to gain experience and strength in order to become an adult, ready to take on responsibility. This transition is shown in small fits and starts that give the actors a chance to show their talents as many of them are not spelled out and must be inferred from glances or other small signs.

Additionally, we are shown how various townspeople care enough for Lars to take on the fiction of Bianca's reality in order to help him. This gives them a chance to indulge in an opportunity to play as Bianca eventually takes on a life of her own in a way that is both humorous and charming.

This is an understated movie and the reflections on these themes are not deep but they are heart-felt. For those willing to let go and also play along this movie has big rewards.

Rated PG-13 for some sex-related content, which is fairly minimal and due to the fact that Bianca is a sex doll which leads to far less joking around than you would expect and in much better taste.

Highly recommended.

1 Down ... 5 to Go (in Dallas)

Breaking News!
Late-term abortion center in Dallas to close

Aaron Women's Health Center performed abortions up to 23 weeks. Last day for abortions is reported to be Saturday, June 28th.

• Aaron's was the focus of a previous 40 Days for Life Campaign - the 2nd one held in the nation, from December 12, 2004 (Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe) - January 22, 2005 (anniversary of tragic Roe v Wade decision) when it was remodeling to do late-term abortions
  
  
• Rumored to have been sinking financially
  
  
• Prayer Service tentatively set for Saturday, June 28th
  
  
• 1 down, 5 to go. Last abortion center in Dallas closed in May of 2001.

CPLC

Just got this via my CPLC pal, Laura. WOOHOO!

ENFJ ... Again!

Prompted by the prayer based on personality types, my curiosity got the better of me and I took the Briggs-Meyers test.

ENFJ.

You know, I could have sworn that I took it before.

Turns out I did, three years ago ... also ENFJ. Not surprising.

The surprising thing was the differences in the percentages. Although it makes sense to me internally as I would have thought I'd have changed some in the last few years.

Perhaps, though, it is due to changed activities in the last three years. For instance, I have a feeling that the lessened "extroverted" score is because I am now involved in many more activities with lots of people ... so my answers to practically everything about spare time wound up involving reading a book or spending time at home.

2005
Extroverted 33%
Intuitive 38%
Feeling 25%
Judging 78%


2008
Extroverted 22%
Intuitive 62%
Feeling 12%
Judging 78%

Ah, but I see the judging is just as strong as ever! (Ahem ... sorry 'bout that y'all!)

I found this to be insightful as a general commentary on the ENFJ personality ... and this really spoke to me. It is a trait that I have noticed and that has annoyed me ... but it seems it is perhaps par for the course.

TRADEMARK: "The first shall be last"

This refers to the open-door policy of ENFJs. One ENFJ colleague always welcomes me into his office regardless of his own circumstances. If another person comes to the door, he allows them to interrupt our conversation with their need. While discussing that need, the phone rings and he stops to answer it. Others drop in with a 'quick question.' I finally get up, go to my office and use the call waiting feature on the telephone. When he hangs up, I have his undivided attention!

So Are Catholics Literalists?

I am slowly working my way through the excellent podcast series studying Torah (Foundations of Biblical Theology) from St. Irenaeus Ministries. I continue to be impressed by the practicality, common sense, and deep truth conveyed by these scripture studies.

This in particular hit me in the face this morning when listening to Interpreting the Scriptures. Beautifully put.

So are Catholics literalists? Well, the problem is one of precise meaning of a tendentious term. Don't use the term I would strongly advise you. Don't use the word "literal." You'd have guilt by association.

So what do we say?

I would say something like this:

"I don't like the term literal. It's mostly misunderstood but I seek to believe and to obey all that the Bible teaches according to God's intention in giving us this text.

I believe that it is true. I believe that that it is without error in all that it teaches us; things which are vital to our salvation and growth and holiness. In our relationship with God I believe that this is vital.

I take it realistically within the normal canons of interpretation and human speech according to what the text purports to be.

I take it seriously and I tremble at the word of God. It is the power of God for salvation. I want to be transformed by it. Those who reject it and minimize its truth multiply their sorrows and their troubles in the sight of God."

David Higbee, FBT - Interpreting the Scriptures

Amen.

(And yes I transcribed this for you phrase by phrase ... that's how powerful I found it.)

Meyers-Briggs Prayers

I don't care what personality type you are ... these will leave you laughing (and also a bit thoughtful...). From Coffee Klatch where they have a link to the test, just in case you don't know your "type." (I don't know ... but also don't care ... which probably in itself says something about me.)

ISTJ: Lord, help me to relax about insignificant details beginning tomorrow at 11:41:23 a.m. E.S.T.

ISTP: God, help me to consider people’s feelings, even if most of them ARE hypersensitive.

ESTP: God, help me to take responsibility for my own actions, even though they’re usually NOT my fault.

ESTJ: God, help me to not try to RUN everything. But, if You need some help, just ask.

ISFJ: Lord, help me to be more laid back and help me to do it EXACTLY right.

ISFP: Lord, help me to stand up for my rights (if you don’t mind my asking).

ESFP: God, help me to take things more seriously, especially parties and dancing.

ESFJ: God, give me patience, and I mean right NOW.

INFJ: Lord, help me not to be a perfectionist. (Did I spell that correctly?)

INFP: God, help me to finish everything I sta

ENFP: God, help me to keep my mind on one th - Look a bird! - at a time.

ENFJ: God, help me to do only what I can and trust you for the rest. Do you mind putting that in writing?

INTJ: Lord, keep me open to other’s ideas, *wrong* though they may be.

INTP: Lord, help me to be less independent, but let me do it my way.

ENTP: Lord, help me follow established procedures today. On second thought, I’ll settle for a few minutes.

ENTJ: Lord, help me slow downandnotrushthroughwhatIdo.

Quick Linkiness: books and movies and related topics

All worth reading (at least to me) so I'm sharing them ... enjoy!

Worth a Thousand Words

From Art Knowledge News
(click through the link to get a larger view)

Worth a Thousand Words

Amsterdam, Nieuwe Kerk, pulpit, cuppa, detail
Originally uploaded by groenling

Lawrence of Arabia? I Don't Think So ...

As Rose is working her way through the AFI's top 100 movies list this summer, she was in the perfect frame of mind to watch AFI's 10 Top 10 special last night. We watched along and found ourselves in an "Oscar watching" frame of mind. As each category came up we'd guess what movies were on the list and which were sure to be in the top 3 for each.

Sometimes we were right and sometimes wrong. And, as is the case with all such lists, sometimes we were very disappointed. Saving Private Ryan and All Quiet on the Western Front in the Epic category? No thanks. For that matter, why isn't there a War category?

Where was Inherit the Wind when they were passing out Courtroom Drama awards? Behind the door? They put in Kramer Versus Kramer and completely ignored Inherit the Wind? Kramer Versus Kramer? No thanks.

Harold and Maude in Romantic Comedies ... ugh. What about An Affair to Remember? Pick either the first one or the remake. Or failing that, put it in there instead of the excruciatingly boring Sleepless in Seattle. Which referenced An Affair to Remember endlessly.

Ah well ...

We actually didn't have any problem with Lawrence of Arabia being in the top 3 of the Epics. My preference would be to have it as #3 ... and moving Gone with the Wind up to #1. Scarlett O'Hara was an infinitely more interesting character than Lawrence and the Civil War definitely more "epic" than the desert ... although your milage may vary on this.

The Animation category did put us in the mood for the movie that we've been waiting for impatiently for some time ...

To Bishop Trautman, from Anne Hathaway: a definition

“One of the things about Barbara Feldon is she has a certain ineffable quality. You either have that or you don’t, and I leave it up to the audience to decide whether I do.” —Anne Hathaway

Once again, Bishop Trautman is complaining about the very difficult words that we will be faced with in the new liturgical translation.

It turns out from the linking and conversation I see around the blogosphere that Bishop Trautman chose poorly when he was tossing out words that will confuse and bewilder the average Catholic. Or perhaps, he is drawing on his own vocabulary deficiency. Should Anne Hathaway's quote not provide enough contextual clues (taught in grade school these days, Bishop), we will help things along a bit.

ineffable

Main Entry:

Pronunciation:

\(ˌ)i-ˈne-fə-bəl\

Function:

adjective

Etymology:

Middle English, from Latin ineffabilis, from in- + effabilis capable of being expressed, from effari to speak out, from ex- + fari to speak — more at ban

Date:

14th century

1 a: incapable of being expressed in words : indescribable <ineffable joy> b: unspeakable <ineffable disgust>2: not to be uttered : taboo ineffable name of Jehovah>

(No need to thank us Bishop. Next time check online at Merriam Webster.) Actually, if he'd read Good Omens, he wouldn't get into these sticky situations. It had a wide audience and that word is key in the book. Honestly, that is the first thing that sprang to my mind when seeing that word being bandied about.

For more about this little contretemps (check here for that meaning, Bishop), check out the Paragraph Farmer's pithy commentary chock-full of good links. For further commentary as well as refreshing our memories about the last time that Bishop Trautman felt "John and Mary Catholic" couldn't get it, check out Amy Welborn.

Thanks to Amy for linking back to my commentary on the whole John and Mary Catholic contretemps (there's that pesky word again!). The most valuable part of my old post is the link to the pdf of the comparison our priest provided between the current and proposed liturgy. Check that out and see how many words you can't pick up from contextual clues ... if, in fact, you are as undereducated as the good Bishop seems to think.

Inspirational Story of Young Mother Giving Life for Baby

Thousands of Poles lined up to say their final goodbyes to Agata Mroz, a young volleyball star who died on June 4 after postponing a bone marrow transplant in order to allow her daughter to be born.

Much thanks to Mark W. for passing along this truly inspirational story (yes, I cried) of a young Polish athlete who put her unborn baby's welfare ahead of her own. It is short but worth it. Go read.

A Convert's Story

... Before we begin, you should know I don’t believe in faith. I take nothing on faith. Nothing. Things must make sense in order for me to believe. Logical sense. My mind is stubborn that way and because of my stubbornly logical mind I was the oldest Catholic that Easter morning to have his head rubbed with oil. However, that same stubbornly logical mind makes it impossible for me to be an atheist. ...

Dirty Harry is taking us through his conversion in a multi-part story. I found this, as with so many good things, via The Anchoress.

I have to say that I didn't realize I'd already been reading Harry's writing over at Libertas where I enjoy their take on movies and Hollywood. (They say what I'm thinking a lot of the time.) I like that tough-minded take on faith and am really looking forward to the other parts of the story.

The Meaning of Life

Thanks to my friend Cyndie for this one.

On the first day, God created the dog and said: "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will l give you a life span of twenty years."

The dog said: "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said: "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."

The monkey said: "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"

And God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow and said: "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves, and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."

The cow said: "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"

And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man and said: "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."

But man said: "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."


So that is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves.

For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family.

For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.

And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you. Enjoy and Thank God everyday for what you have.

Worth a Thousand Words

Facing the Sun by Qiang-Huang
Used by permission. Click on the link above for more beautiful art by this painter.

On the Home Front

• Rose is reading Auralia's Colors and liking it a lot. Though she is picking up Biblical character types in it ... which surprised Hannah and me since we didn't notice anything like that.
  
  
• Mouth Wide Open has another installment up at Forgotten Classics podcast. Never fear. We shall return to The Wonder Stick and Ru's adventures next week.
  
  
• Tom and I are going away for two days to celebrate our anniversary (late). So if there is a lack of updating around here, I'm sure you'll understand why.
  
  
• Getting ready for the trip to Rose's school in July (doubling for our family vacation), I've reserved the dogs their places at a unique boarding experience ... the Canine Country Club Day Spa and Resort. Isn't that too hilarious? It is attached to the vet where Hannah works and I'd heard good things about it a few years ago from an acquaintance. So we shall see ...
  
  
• I just began reading A Long Retreat: In Search of a Religious Life and am finding it strangely compelling reading. Just a few chapters in but will keep y'all updated.
  
  
• I finished Silence last night. WOW, WHAT A BOOK! I was (happily) surprised not to find it depressing as I had heard many others say. What I found was it was so very thought provoking. I think I probably will have to reread the last chapter (not the Appendix) as I need to think about this some more. I will do more of a "proper" review later but can HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT! I'm really looking forward to discussing this with the book club.
  
  
• Hannah has been watching Arrested Development. I had forgotten just how drop-dead funny it was. That may be a series we need to buy.
  
  
• Hannah also has been reading the Deathworld series from Harry Harrison. I'd also forgotten just how entertaining those books are. Next, I'm going to show her West of Eden ... a masterpiece of sci-fi.
  
  
• Rose and I finally began finally catching up on Lost. It will give you an idea of how far behind we are when I say that we just watched "The Other Woman" where Juliette has a fling with ... Godwin (?). Nothing like a little adultery to get everyone's emotions going. Although Ben takes possessive to new heights.
  
  
• Tom took on a personal project that benefited ... me! He brought home a computer from the office that wasn't being used and set it up for podcasting. In a separate room so people don't have to tiptoe around and I don't have to get up on Sundays at 6 a.m. so I'm not bothering everyone. Bought a new microphone ... and a mixing board. Installed free software (at great expense of hours and patience!) and has been working with it to set levels, etc. All his own idea. What a sweetheart!
  
  
• My pal, Laura, has begun an internship as a sidewalk counselor at abortion mills locally. It is, naturally, emotionally wearing for her. However, it has been a really good reminder for me every single day as I hear her stories that I need to keep everyone ... babies, mothers, families, counselors ... in the front of my mind and my prayer life. As well as praying for the softened hearts of those in the abortion industry.
  

Worth a Thousand Words

The Bat in Colonia Guell at the Secretary's House

This seems just about right for Friday the 13th, doesn't it?

Check out the link above for more of Barcelona Photoblog's great photos!

There is no loophole with God

A couple of days ago, walking through the parking garage in the morning, it crossed my mind to pray for patience.

I recalled a conversation from the night before where a friend said that he didn't pray for patience because he didn't want to be sent occasions to practice. So he would pray for the other people, the ones who were causing him grief. We shouted with laughter over this idea that he had found a loophole. (One of the best known examples of this idea of God sending occasions to practice can be found here.)

However, it had rubbed off enough that when the thought crossed my mind, I pushed it away. I didn't want to bring extra practice upon myself (and I have had plenty of experience with that ... just try asking the Holy Spirit what you need to work on. Oh, the humanity!). Oh, bad influence that I allowed my friend to be!

Then I went on to have one heckuva day. Holy Moly, did it test my patience repeatedly. In fact, I found myself constantly thinking, "Just hold on. Be patient. Don't lose it." In trying circumstances I am not usually that self aware.

As I wearily returned to my car, much later than usual, the morning's thought came back to me. I told God, "Look, it was a stray thought. Not an actual prayer!" And then had a hearty laugh at myself for my silliness.

Later I realized that perhaps that had been a nudge because I was going to need patience and a prayer for help would have given me some extra grace.

Oh so foolish as we are to think that we can outsmart God.

Worth a Thousand Words

On the Verandah

Used with permission.
For more by this talented photographer, go to Visual Thoughts.

Goodbye L'il iBuddy

The time we had together seemed so fleeting. From our first adventures together to the time when ... it still hurts to think of it ... your hard drive failed yesterday. It was so sad, so tragic to see the apple clicking on ... clicking off ... clicking on ... clicking off ... and nothing we did could help.

[Give me a minute ... I'll be ok ...]

Now we have the new puppy l'il silver buddy prancing around the place, making himself at home.


Sure it's micro, sleek, and ... yes, I'll say it ... sexy. But it's so tiny I'm afraid that I'll lose it, that it will fall out of my pocket, never to be found. Or that I will drop it (such a strange shape when I'm used to a rectangle).

Will it ever have a playlist that will hold podcasts ... the way you did, my faithful friend?

It might, but it will never match the adventures we had together. ...

---------------------

P.S. By the way, on a practical note, I can't get the darned thing to read playlists that have podcasts in them. From what I see around the internet I am afraid that playlists only will work with songs in them now ... is that right? Anyone know?

Worth a Thousand Words

Bronze Bird and Roses

Featured by permission.
Click through on the link to see more of Belinda Del Pesco's wonderful art.