It's Funny Because It's True: The Onion and A Wrinkle in Time

Negative Review Of ‘A Wrinkle In Time’ Peppered With Critic Assuring Readers He Still Totally Supports Diversity

OAKLAND, CA—Alternating his problems with the film’s story structure, pacing, and overall tone with effusive praise for the cast of strong, multicultural women, Bay Area Examiner film columnist Justin Garren published a negative review of A Wrinkle In Time Friday in which he nevertheless took pains to remind his readership of his support for diversity. “This adaptation of Madeleine L’Engle’s young-adult classic sanitizes the book’s most powerful themes, making it a rare miss for director Ava DuVernay, whose MLK biopic, Selma, I give my highest recommendation,” Garren wrote in his two-star review of the science-fiction adventure, painstakingly and repeatedly noting that his objections to the film are purely on cinematic grounds. “There’s plenty of blame to go around, as many of the film’s problems lie squarely at the feet of white people—Jennifer Lee delivered a tepid screenplay that was done no favors by Chris Pine’s hardly there performance.” At press time, Garren had taken to social media to promote his thinkpiece lavishing praise on virtually every aspect of Black Panther.

From The Onion which boldly says what we're all thinking, and makes us laugh along the way. I have to say I never saw Joe Morgenstern be as nice as he was in his review while still pointing out all the reasons it was a bad movie. He's usually perfectly happy to rip a film to shreds, but not this time.

Weekend: Fish and Chips

A young hiker was traveling through a heavily wooded area and came upon a monastery full of friars and monks. He knocks on the door for directions, however he was invited inside for "fish and chips" for lunch.

After lunch he exclaimed that this was the most delicious fish and chips he had ever eaten. Seeing a chef emerge from the kitchen, he raced over and said, "Are you the Fish Friar?"

To which the reply was, "No, I am the Chip Monk."

Thanks to Mark Woodward of CowPi Journal for this one!

Worth a Thousand Words: Houses at Auvers

Vincent van Gogh, Houses at Auvers

Well Said: Arrogance and God's Mercy

"Kristin," the priest said sternly. "Are you so arrogant that you think yourself capable of sinning so badly that God's mercy is not great enough?"

Sigrid Undset, Kristin Lavransdatter

Listen Up — The Curious Cases of Rutherford & Fry

Science sleuths Dr Adam Rutherford and Dr Hannah Fry investigate everyday mysteries sent by listeners.

Here's another great show from the BBC. This half-hour podcast combines science with light-hearted presentation. Hannah Fry and Adam Rutherford are bona fide scientists but they bring a sense of fun and discovery to each question. Finding the answers can lead them into unexpected places but the questions themselves are often very simple.

• Why do we dream?
• Why do tunes get stuck in our heads?
• How far up can a helium balloon go?
• Can horses count?
• Why don't children like vegetables?

And many, many more. I love the hosts' chemistry and banter and their willingness to investigate any question, even when they seem silly. 

These questions are often suitable for family listening, as their simplicity indicates, and the show is produced for the radio so it is fairly family friendly. However, it is produced for adult listeners so you may want to preview episodes before listening with the kids. For example, when they examine the question of hair growing to different lengths leads to discussion including  all the different places where hair grows.

Litany of Humility

I picked this up from EWTN. It is by Merry Cardinal del Val, secretary of state to Pope Saint Pius X from the prayer book for Jesuits, 1963. For use in private devotion.

O Jesus, meek and humble of heart, Hear me.

From the desire of being esteemed, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being loved, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being extolled, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being honored, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being praised, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being preferred to others, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being consulted, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the desire of being approved, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being humiliated, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being despised, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of suffering rebukes, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being calumniated, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being forgotten, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being ridiculed, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being wronged, Deliver me, O Jesus.
From the fear of being suspected, Deliver me, O Jesus.

That others may be loved more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be esteemed more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That, in the opinion of the world, others may increase and I may decrease, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be chosen and I set aside, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be praised and I go unnoticed, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be preferred to me in everything, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

UPDATE
For bloggers there is Jeff Miller's Litany of Blog Humility ... it's funny because it's true. And it can be adapted for all sorts of social media, which weren't prominent (or even invented) when Jeff first did this litany.

If you can listen to a sermon podcast, why go to the church?

We know the answer to that one, right?

This came up in an email conversation with my Good Story podcast partner Scott Danielson. I thought you might enjoy it as much as I did.

Scott:

From the Catholicism-knows-what-its-doing-department, I was listening to the Phil Vischer Podcast and a guy was on there that wrote an article stating that podcasts of sermons are resulting in fewer churchgoers. They can get a sermon while drinking coffee, why actually go to the church?

Then a guy said something like, "well isn't the problem that people perceive the sermon as the main point of going to church?"

The another guy said that churches ought to "be creative" and do things other than sermons at the church.

And I thought that in the Catholic Church, the Eucharist is why we go. I love a good homily but of course it's Eucharist.

Interesting that some other Christian Churches are wondering what to do on Sundays.

Julie:

That IS interesting ... and your observation is so true.

Just this morning our pastor celebrated Mass and his homily was so deep and thoughtful and fantastic. In marked opposition to some of the other priests that are on the daily Mass schedule. One priest in particular is just disinterested, as far as I can tell ... we get the same message every time.

However, as Rose and I keep reminding ourselves - we aren't there for the homily. The point is that Jesus is there in the Eucharist. And that's why we are there.

The Church is truly our Mother ... helping us find the way. And I am so grateful for that.

Worth a Thousand Words: My Wife's Lovers

Carl Kahler, My Wife's Lovers

Ok, this is just hilarious.

Well Said: The priests from the barley lands

They received food from the monks at the churches they visited, and when they drank the blood-red wine and broke off the golden crust from the bread made of wheat, all four priests from the barley lands understood why Christ had honored wine and wheat, which were purer than all other foodstuffs that God had given humankind, by manifesting himself in their likeness during the holy communion.

Sigrid Undset, Kristin Lavransdatter

Worth a Thousand Words: Among the Sierra Nevada, California

Albert Bierstadt, Among the Sierra Nevada, California

Be sure to click on the image and look at it in original size. It is simply breathtaking.

Well Said: Seeing her own life from the uppermost summit of a mountain pass

She had finally come so far that she seemed to be seeing her own life from the uppermost summit of a mountain pass. Now her path led down into the darkening valley, but first she had been allowed to see that in the solitude of the cloister and in the doorway of death someone was waiting for her who had always seen the lives of people the way villages look from a mountain crest. He had seen sin and sorrow, love and hatred in their hearts, the way the wealthy estates and poor hovels, the bountiful acres and the abandoned wastelands are all borne by the same earth. And he had come down among them, his feet had wandered among the lands, stood in the castles and in huts, gathering the sorrows and sins of the rich and the poor, and lifting them high up with him on the cross. Not my happiness or my pride, but my sin and my sorrow, oh sweet Lord of mine. She looked up at the crucifix, where it hung high overhead, above the triumphal arch.

Sigrid Undset, Kristin Lavransdatter

Lent and Me — Update

I realized we're about halfway through Lent, which is often enough time to realize the benefits of our sacrifices. So a brief update from me.

Giving up:

• Most of the internet, except for Happy Catholic which will be like my little hermitage. No Facebook, Goodreads, or Letterboxd.
  These have been surprisingly easy to live without. So much so that I can foresee not returning to active participation when Lent is finished. Of course, I can also see how much avoidance I was practicing by spending a lot of time on those sites. And I can still post things on Facebook from here by using the Facebook symbol and it won't take me into the Facebook forum.

Adding on:

• Daily Mass during the week. I've been dreading it. Not dreading Mass but getting myself to follow a strict enough schedule to fit it in. That's the challenge.
  This has been the real toughie. I realized just how indulgent I've been with my timing. Working at home, I rarely had to get myself going by a certain time in the morning. This self discipline has been wearing but definitely good for me. I don't doubt that daily Mass is also good for me but those are results that I can't see right now. Seeds planted in the earth need time for germination and doubtless that is the result of daily communion.

Reading:

• Lenten Nonfiction
  
  The Power of Silence by Cardinal Sarah.
  I began this a couple of weeks ago and a few paragraphs daily are perfect morning reading for Lent.
  I read about 2/3 of this and then needed no more silence from that particular source. It was quite good, just a bit long on the topic for me. This may also be influenced by the fact that I'd read Sarah's book God or Nothing right before and it also had many meditations on silence woven throughout.
  
  The Reed of God by Caryll Houselander.
  This is a series of meditations upon Mary which are linked to the practical and inspirational in our own lives. It is profoundly Christocentric, as any good meditations upon Mary must be.
  
  
• Lenten Fiction
  
  Little Women by Louisa May Alcott.
  Waiting for Heather Ordover at CraftLit to begin Anne of Green Gables I roamed over her vast library and remembered that I didn't listen to Little Women when she covered it. I picked up the audiobook to accompany her excellent commentary. Reading it when younger I never paid attention to the Pilgrim's Progress theme that runs throughout. Heather is making sure I don't miss that theme and the simplicity of the book's old fashioned values is proving quite strengthening right now. I realized this morning that it is also excellent Lenten reading.
  This was really inspirational despite the simplicity. It was the return to roots which helps anchor me in everyday life.
  
  The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne
  The effects of sin, confessed and unconfessed, on the perpetrators and everyone around them — all wrapped in a compelling story.

Worth a Thousand Words: Wonderful Winter Day

Wonderful Winter Day, Remo Savisaar

Blogging Around

In a first, archdiocese unveils it parish pastoral plan for Amoris Laetitia

From The Deacon's Bench comes news that the Archdiocese of Washington has a plan for implementing Amoris Laetitia on a parish level.

What's the plan and can it be trusted is the question that comes to mind. Deacon Kandra has links and, what is more important, he asked his friend Deacon Bill Ditewig analyze the plan. Ditewig is a deacon for the Archdiocese of Washington and a theologian with over a quarter century of pastoral and ministerial experience. His commentary upon the pastoral plan was thorough and impressive. It certainly captured my attention by providing much needed context. He gives the plan thumbs up  but do go read the whole thing. Here's a bit ...

The document’s first significant contribution is context. In the Preface, Cardinal Wuerl makes clear that the Plan incorporates not only the teaching of Amoris Laetitia itself, but also the two Synods which preceded and inspired it. For me this is a most important reminder. Far too frequently, observers have attempted to read and comprehend the pope’s Exhortation without this context, and that, in my opinion, is not only inadequate but dangerous. “Text” always requires “context”, and the Cardinal makes this clear: to understand and to implement Amoris Laetitia, one must situate it within that broader global synodal process. Amoris Laetitia, precisely as a post-synodal apostolic exhortation, reflects not merely the personal teaching of the Holy Father himself; it is that, certainly, but so much more. The work of the preceding synods involved representatives of the world’s episcopal conferences, extensive consultation and research over several years, and intense discussions during the synods themselves. All of this reflected both the importance of the challenges facing contemporary families and the diversity of pastoral responses needed to help them.

What the "average German" really thought during WWII

We often read in history books statements about what people knew and thought during historical events. What's particularly interesting reading an extensive diary account such as this is seeing precisely what a German man with his eyes open (ordinary in all senses other than being anti-Nazi) saw and thought as events unfolded.

DarwinCatholic reviews My Opposition which was the secret diary of an ordinary German citizen during WWII. Darwin shares extensive excerpts. The review and excerpts were fascinating so I can only imagine how the book must grab you, provided you enjoy reading a diary.


Best Films of 2017
Steven Greydanus has a round up of best film lists from a lot of Christian film reviewers.

Well Said: A reflection of the heavens in the puddles of a muddy road

Dear sister—all other love is merely a reflection of the heavens in the puddles of a muddy road. You will become sullied too if you allow yourself to sink into it. But if you always remember that it’s a reflection of the light from that other home, then you will rejoice at its beauty and take good care that you do not destroy it by churning up the mire at the bottom.

Sigrid Undset, Kristin Lavransdatter

Scott and Julie steal a painting, elude an assassin, avoid a war, join a secret society, escape prison, and eat cake.

All while learning to become Lobby Boys, completely invisible yet always in sight. Join us as we discuss The Grand Budapest Hotel at A Good Story is Hard to Find podcast.

Worth a Thousand Words: Smoke of a .45

Charles Marion Russell, Smoke of a .45

Well Said: The Consequence of Sin

But I didn’t realize then that the consequence of sin is that you have to trample on other people.

Sigrid Undset, Kristin Lavransdatter

This seems to me to be the theme of the entire book.

Many thanks ...

... to the person who bought me The Reed of God from my Amazon wish list.

Your kindness has touched me ... and provided excellent reading too! 

Weekend Joke: Boudreaux and Lent

Boudreaux walks into a bar and orders three beers. The bartender raises his eyebrows, but serves Boudreaux three beers, which Boudreaux drinks quietly at a table, alone.

An hour later, Boudreaux has finished the three beers and orders three more. This happens yet again.

The next evening at the bar, Boudreaux again orders and drinks three beers at a time, several times.

This happens for several nights.

Soon, the people up and down the bayou are whispering about Boudreaux going to the bar and always drinking three beers at a time.

Finally, a week later, the bartender says "Boudreaux, I don't mean to be nosey, but everybody around here is wondering why you always order three beers at one time?"

Boudreaux replies, "You see, I have two brothers. One moved to Texas and de udder one to Mississippi. We promised each other dat we would always order an extra two beers whenever we drank as a way of keepin up de Boudreaux bond."

Everybody on the bayou was impressed with Boudreaux's explanation, and Boudreaux was the talk of the bayou.

Then, one day, Boudreaux comes in to the bar and orders only two beers.

The bartender pours them with a heavy heart. This continues for the rest of the evening ... Boudreaux always orders only two beers. The word flies up and down the bayou. Prayers are offered for the soul of one of the Boudreaux brothers.

The next day, the bartender says to Boudreaux, "People on the bayou and I want to offer condolences to you for the death of your brother. You know - the two beers and all."

Boudreaux ponders this for a moment, then replies, "You'll be happy to hear dat my two brothers are alive and well. It's jus dat me, myself, has decided to give up drinkin' for Lent."