Friday, May 20, 2011

Re: The End of the World - UPDATED

To: Tom D.
Seeing as the world is ending Saturday, I'm wondering if the office is open tomorrow. Please respond in haste, trying to make last-day-on-earth plans.

Thanks and see ya on the other side!

To Laura H.
Sorry, we're only taking off the day before the Mayan end of the world.

Which means we'll get a Thursday off in 2012*. Woohoo!

In related news: Post Rapture Looting
I've been invited by Frank Weathers to the Post-Rapture Looting (since Catholics will be Left Behind, as Tim LaHaye has reliably informed us - I don't mind ... it's primarily an evangelical thing as I understand it).

What would we do without Facebook?

Time: Saturday, May 21 · 12:00pm - 3:00pm

Location: Everywhere

More Info: When everyone is gone and God's not looking, we need to pick up some sweet stereo equipment and maybe some new furniture for the mansion we're going to squat in.
For the Catholic take on the whole "rapture" concept as it is understood here, read more here.
*For more on the Mayan end of the world (Dec. 21, 2012), see here.

In related news: Raptor attack info
Whereas Joe believes we are defending against the wrong Raptor and that there will be dire consequences. (Check his site for thorough defense plans.)
I have been informed that the person, some Protestant minister, who has predicted the arrival of the Raptor this Sunday may be mistaken. Foolish people are trying to disprove him by the use of Scripture. I can tell you most definitely that the Scripture is silent on Velociraptor attacks. (I have checked thoroughly).
Doing the Math: Rapture + Zombie Apocalypse = Movies and Beer!
Frank's got it all together for reveling in the apocalypse ... including the beer. I love being Catholic. Someone always brings drinks along.

For more thoughtful takes ... and some that are not so thoughtful (which we always enjoy) ... The Anchoress has a Rapture Round-Up

Also, I would like to mention, in case I am upsetting anyone who sincerely believes in the rapture, that I make fun of many things. For example, the quote in the sidebar (which will be changing later in the day) shows that I can take it as well as dish it out. (From the Contemporary American Poultry episode of Community)
Troy: If God were edible - not that I'm Catholic - but if it was cool to eat God, he'd be a chicken finger.


  1. But what about the Zombies?

  2. O ... no zombies in the rapture (or so I understand it). But I'll have an update with further zombie news as I get it! :-)

  3. Zombies come after the rapture. That's a theology I'm making up as I go. :-D

  4. "I love being Catholic. Someone always brings drinks along."

    As I'm always reminding people, we're the party church.


  5. I eagerly anticipate the moment when self-righteous, judgemental bigots will be lifted up ("raptored"??) to their "happy place" ...and leave us to wallow in our not-always-happy, but gloriously, passionately human home.

  6. I wish Catholic Bibliophagist's comment had a "Like" button.

  7. One news article I saw got even more specific than Saturday; it said 6:00 pm Saturday. Presumably that's 6:00 pm local time wherever you are. I hope the "Get Religion" guys are planning to look at followup stories...

  8. Do not confuse about the situation going on today's world. What Jesus says in the Holy Bible about the End of this World and the Second coming of Christ..You need to Read more References in Holy Bible but one thing is True and that is only the Father(God) knows about the End Time. you need to read Holy Bible: Matthew 24, then you will get perfect idea..
    If you want more perfect idea about the End Time of the World then read my Blog..

  9. Those dodos give Christianity a bad name, if you ask me. The atheists are already trying to pin this nonsense on all Christians. All I can say is thank God I was a cradle Catholic and had the best Christian denomination right at my fingertips. ;)

  10. Actually, I do get a bit offended at the assertion that Catholics aren't really Christians and that we'll be left behind. Years ago, a woman I worked with was reading one of the books. I asked her about it - I had heard nothing about the series yet - and she quite seriously informed me that nope, Catholics would not be taken up in the rapture. I decided that the best thing to do for workplace harmony was just walk away.

  11. Never fear, the CDC has issued a Zombie Apocalypse Alert.

  12. The atheists are already trying to pin this nonsense on all Christians.-Manny

    Let 'em. I fire back with a reminder of the atheist prediction of a Population Bomb apocalypse that never happened. Why doesn't that reflect badly on all atheists - hmmm?