When You Return to 776 Posts in Your Google Reader After 3 Days of Not Using the Internet, You Know You're Reading Too Many Blogs

Oy veh!

Overall the fast turn-around to get Rose to Chicago and get home again went well, but we will never do it that quickly again. The 16-hour trip is brutal when done back-to-back without at least a day of rest in between. However, we are home again safely and that is what counts at this point.

Highlights and tips:

• Who knew that the Illinois State Fair happened in August, just at the time we'd be driving through looking for a hotel room? And that it would overflow the town's hotels practically completely? We wound up at the downtown Abraham Lincoln hotel which was completely luxurious, especially when they upgraded the regular smoking room we would have settled for into a "club level" room. Oooo la la. Crabtree & Evelyn soap and shampoo in the bathroom ladies. And those fluffy bathrobes are quite nice. Yes, indeed.
• Tom and I daringly didn't make a hotel reservation in Chicago, having heard all those relatives tell their tales of "day of" reservations on Priceline getting fantastic discounts for a nice hotel. No such luck on our attempt. However, the downtown TravelLodge isn't too bad either price-wise or as a hotel, though it is fairly dumpy. But it was close to where Rose lives and just a block away from Grant Park.
• Let me highly recommend Thai Spoon. Highly. Really fantastic food. Also the price was actually inexpensive. Rose says that many Columbia College students like it because they can order a large meal and have leftovers for several days. We fed eight people, with three beers and a Thai iced coffee for $100 flat. In downtown Chicago. Absolutely delicious. Try it.
• After the Thai Spoon, Tom and I took a walk in Grant Park where we eventually wound up at Buckingham Fountain. We'd noticed a young couple taking photos of each other near us. The young man came up to Tom and asked, "Will you take our picture? And then will you keep taking pictures while I propose?" Can you see the smile on my face just thinking of it? It was sweet and romantic and we will treasure always being "that couple who took our picture" in this young couple's memories. Of course, she cried and laughed and said yes ... and had a huge diamond on her ring. I will be praying for them and their marriage every time that memory flashes across my mind.
• Finally we got to see the inside of Holy Name Cathedral for Sunday Mass, after having been kept away first by renovations and then by the fire damage. Overall it is absolutely gorgeous. It is too bad that someone came through in the 1970's (our guess) and replaced all the original stained glass and slapped on various other "improvements" that are all too indicative of the bad taste of the time. Those bits stood out like a bandaid on a Van Gogh. However, the original work is gorgous, as I said. Also, there was a wonderful girls' choir visiting from Germany. I thought that might be a little sample of how the angelic choir sounds.
• Stopped off on the way up to take Mom her new laptop and then on the way back to make sure it was connected to the wireless internet (woohoo! Hi Mom!) which is so much faster in their assisted living place than any sort of internet was at their house in the country. Now she can actually watch those videos I post. Also we went to lunch at Ocean Zen which is truly excellent and if you are near Springfield, MO, you should definitely try it if you've never been.

And now we are home ... ready to do those lovely mundane thing like clean bathrooms, grocery shop, and go to work (which I must do now!).

On th Road to Chi-Town

Taking Rose back to Columbia College. Perhaps time to blog then, but probably not as we're doing a two-day-up turnaround for a two-day-back trip.

We'll be stopping off to give my Mom her new laptop. This will give her time to try it out and figure out what questions she has before we stop back by on the way home.

More later ...

The problem with real life ...

... is that it leaves no time for blogging when you get really, really, really busy.

So, there you go. Apologies all 'round, but clients wait for no man and family likewise.

Check my sidebar for Google reader links of some great stuff in the blogosphere that is just waiting for you to discover it. I'll be back to more than the quote and photo of the day soon, I hope!

"Does going to confession make you feel better?" What I said. What I'll say next time. Hopefully.

My brother and nephew are in town for a couple of days. I have so much fun talking with my brother but every so often such a question arises as it did when we were out having a Tex-Mex family dinner. I had laughingly said that I needed to get to confession over something we'd been mentioning ... then said, "no, not really, though I've got to get there on Tuesday over something else."

Which raised that question from my brother, who is a nondenominational Protestant. Somehow, knowing the way he thinks and what he does for a living (which involves occasional mind manipulation), I always feel I've got to stand up for the Catholic way even if he is just phrasing it as a mild mannered question. Which probably says more about me than anything else.

I answered, "Yes."

Then thought, "well, not always sometimes yes and sometimes no. But this time I am really looking forward to it and so I probably will feel better."

By which time he'd said, "I understand."

I said, "No you don't understand."

He said, "Yes, I understand better than you'd think."

You have to understand that I'd had most of a nice strong margarita by then and anyway am not nearly as good at explaining myself when speaking as I am in writing. Also, I didn't suddenly want to dive into the depths of discussing confession as a sacrament in the middle of a restaurant at a family dinner.

Swirling through my head were thoughts of how to explain confession as a sacrament, feelings versus truth, and that when I go to confession I have thought and prayed about my offenses so that I already have gone to God personally about whatever it is. And the fact that "feeling better" makes it sound like a substitute for therapy, which it is not. The one thing I did know was that I was unequal to that task at that moment.

I let it go.

This, hopefully, has prepared me better for another time. Then I might be collected enough to answer, "Sometimes I feel better and sometimes I feel nothing. But it's not about feelings. It's about the reality of the sacrament of absolution from sin and reconciling myself to God."

If it carried on, we could go into how telling a doctor my symptoms might make me feel better sharing the burden, but it would be the medicine itself which would effect the cure. About how a sacrament is a visible sign of spiritual reality.

I am a poor apologist in person. But there's always next time. Hopefully.

Heads Up! The Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri FREE @ Christian Audio

This is where it turns out handy that friendly pagans like Jesse at SFFaudio have an interest in the Divine Comedy as the first fantasy novel.

Check it out and note Jesse's careful instructions for receiving this free audiobook.

Thanks Jesse!

First Friday Fast to End Abortion

I haven't forgotten but just hadn't posted it yet ... for those fasting for an end to abortion, it's First Friday!

By the way, listening to this episode of Philosopher's Notes helped me go into this cheerfully and purposefully. He's not kidding when he says, "99% is a b***h; 100% is a breeze. You can listen, download, or read the transcript there.

Our Lady of Guadalupe: More Than Flowers

Continuing with excerpts from Our Lady of Guadalupe, we continue to see the depth of symbolism speaking in every item and gesture being used. For instance, I didn't know that the bishop-elect had been lied to. The stories I remember just implied that he was a crusty old so-and-so who didn't like Indians (which is completely untrue as I discovered in reading this book). I didn't realize those flowers had to do double duty. Read on and see what I mean.

The bishop-elect, disarmed by Juan Diego's confidence, sent two men to follow him to make sure that Juan Diego was not up to any tricks. The two men trailed Juan Diego for a good while but lost sight of him as he crossed the ravine near the bridge to Tepeyac. After a desperate and unsuccessful search, they returned to Friar Zumarraga's home and, infuriated with Juan Diego for having wasted their time, told Zumarraga that Juan Diego was a sorcerer and a fraud who deserved punishment to prevent him from lying again. ...

[Our Lady gives Juan Diego a sign for Friar Z. by putting roses in his tilma.]

Perhaps it is in this moment, as the Virgin stoops to rearrange the flowers in Juan Diego's tilma, that we are given the most poetically poignant expression of what the apparitions at Guadalupe would have meant to the Indian people. In her appearances on Tepeyac, the Virgin takes what is good and true in the Indian culture and rearranges it in such a way that these same elements are brought tothe fulfillment of truth. In the Indian culture, flowers and song (which, you will recall, Juan Diego heard just before the first apparition) were symbols of truth -- more specifically, the truth that, though somehow intuited by reason, is never comprehensively grasped. Thus the Virgin's sign of flowers, which had to undo the lie told to Firar Zumarrage by the false messengers, possesses a double meaning: more than a sign for the bishop-elect that is impossible to explain away as a mere trick by Juan Diego; for the indegenous people it is a sign of truth.

[Juan Diego takes the flowers to the bishop who recognizes the truth, unties the tilma from around Juan diego's neck, takes it immediately to his private chapel, and welcomes Juan Diego to spend the day in his home.]

In the account of the Guadalupan apparitions and miracles, there are many significant moments of reconciliation. In the image itself, one sees a perfect harmony of cultures and their respective symbols that convey the same truth. But for the Indians and laymen, the impression of the Virgin's image on the tilma and the acceptance of Juan Diego's tilma into the chapel are perhaps the most significant moments. In the Indian culture, the tilma reflected social status. A peasant's tilma would be plain and undecorated, while a tilma with color or decoration was reserved for noblemen and peole of high social rank. For the Indians, the Virgin, by placing her image on Juan Diego's tilma, gives a new and elevated dignity to the common person and especially the Indian.

Moreover, this dignity is recognized by the bishop-elect when, as the head of the Church in Mexico, he publicly and personally accepts the tilma into his own private chapel and welcomes Juan Diego into his home. At this moment, all of Juan Diego's roles that had previously impeded his total participation in the Church after the conquest -- as an Indian, a convert, a layman, and a man of limited social significance -- are welcomed as having an important and decisive place in the Church and its mission of evangelization.

Our Lady of Guadalupe: Mother of the Civilization of Love
by Carl Anderson, Eduardo Chavez

I Miss Scott Nehring!

Thanks. Just had to get that out of my system.

Some Very Good Advice: Duty Before Holiness

Just as I was feeling doomed to unwittingly stray away from God by following "good" inspirations that would end up negatively impacting my life or the lives of my loved ones, I came across a three-word nugget of wisdom that would end up being one of the most helpful pieces of advice I've ever heard:

Duty before holiness.

A must read from Jen at Conversion Diary.

This quote ranges a bit wider and applies to everyone a bit more than a similar one which I like from St. Francis of Rome.

A married woman must often leave God at the altar in order to find Him in her housework.

We get the point though. It is tempting to be pulled away from everyday, mundane activities that are nevertheless of paramount importance: spouse, children, family, home. However, these are the places where God manifests Himself if we are striving to walk in Jesus' footsteps.

After all, let us not forget, Jesus spent all but three years of his life as a regular Joe, a carpenter with an everyday life in the back end of nowhere. If it's good enough for God, then it should be good enough for us.

Do People Still Cook? Michael Pollan's Answer Raises Hackles But I Think He is Right.

Just for a break from the usual controversial subjects that may be broached around here, let's take a look at the latest food world controversy. The upcoming movie Julie & Julia there has been an anticipatory swell of writing. I, personally, am looking forward to seeing Meryl Streep's take on Julia Child which is supposed to be really wonderful.

However, it prompted food writer and activist Michael Pollan to write a long, thoughtful article for the NY Times which has garnered some surprising response. Naturally, I have my own take on it as it dovetailed in with a conversation I had during the Beyond Cana retreat. Those who are interested will find it here at Meanwhile, Back in the Kitchen.

It's All Downhill from Here

A little something from Dr. Boli to brighten us as we move through the week.



I hear that Whole Foods is planning a return to their natural food roots. Now we can see the strength of their argument!

Those Aren't Fighting Words

“I don’t love you anymore. I’m not sure I ever did.”

His words came at me like a speeding fist, like a sucker punch, yet somehow in that moment I was able to duck. And once I recovered and composed myself, I managed to say, “I don’t buy it.” Because I didn’t.

He drew back in surprise. Apparently he’d expected me to burst into tears, to rage at him, to threaten him with a custody battle. Or beg him to change his mind.

So he turned mean. “I don’t like what you’ve become.”

Gut-wrenching pause. How could he say such a thing? That’s when I really wanted to fight. To rage. To cry. But I didn’t.

Instead, a shroud of calm enveloped me, and I repeated those words: “I don’t buy it.”

You see, I’d recently committed to a non-negotiable understanding with myself. I’d committed to “The End of Suffering.” I’d finally managed to exile the voices in my head that told me my personal happiness was only as good as my outward success, rooted in things that were often outside my control. I’d seen the insanity of that equation and decided to take responsibility for my own happiness. And I mean all of it.

[...]

I said: “It’s not age-appropriate to expect children to be concerned with their parents’ happiness. Not unless you want to create co-dependents who’ll spend their lives in bad relationships and therapy. There are times in every relationship when the parties involved need a break. What can we do to give you the distance you need, without hurting the family?”

“Huh?” he said.

An eye opening example of perspective, maturity, and love from this NY Times story. Also, though there is no mention of faith, to me this is a powerful example of covenantal love, giving your spouse 100% even when you are getting zero.

Via my dear Rita who, with her husband, brought Beyond Cana to our parish. She saw it at Faith & Family Live where Danielle Bean makes some good comments as well.

So now the air conditioner compressor is out at work

So now it looks as if the only place I have AC is in my car.

Really, I hate to have a whole building of people take it on the chin for the Beyond Cana retreat. It must be bearing fantastic fruit right now.

And I have something new to offer up. So ... if I live through it, then its all to the good!

Warm, but good.

Memo to Current Generation: Be Not Afraid. Keep Hope Alive.

More and more, we are hearing from people who might best be described as anti-birthers. Their claims have nothing to do with long- versus short-form Hawaiian birth certificates. Instead, they advance a simple proposition: that the birth of each additional American child is a kind of calamity for the environment.

You know when I see a WSJ op-ed titled American Babies Are Ruining Everything that I am going to stop and read it.

It is brief and I encourage you reading it, especially since I'm going to give a spoiler. I'll wait ...

Essentially, this is a summary of the creeping attitude we all know too well these days, especially if one is pro-life. Babies hurt the environment and make life harder for the rest of us so they are not really an occasion for celebration if one has more than two.

Tom blames Malthus. So do I. That Negative Nellie who predicted horrible things from overpopulation may have alerted us to the need for feeding the world better, but he left no positive message to look forward to after that. Later generations have taken his negativity and simply tweaked it to their own uses. The latest of these, of course, is the environment, which for many is elevated far beyond the original concerns of making sure that it can sustain life for all as it should (which I support so don't get all over me about this ... I recycle newspapers and suchlike). For many "the environment" as a cause has taken on religious undertones that make it equal in itself to human life.

Never have I been more happy to be Catholic. The Church understands and promotes stewardship of the earth but always with the understanding that human life, people, are the most precious of God's creations. Supporting man's dignity and right to life itself therefore trumps specious semi-scientific claims of environmental good in this case.

I find it interesting that in the age of technology, living more comfortably than any generation has, we also are more afraid than ever that our earthly comforts might diminish in some way. What has happened to the spirit of exploration and discovery that fueled some of man's greatest inventions? We have walked on the moon, looked at far away stars with the Hubble telescope, developed penicillin and other "wonder drugs" that extend life, built pyramids with little more than ingenuity, and so much more. Why now are we such a bunch of nay sayers, fearful of the future?

I was infused with the optimistic belief that man will overcome obstacles long before I became Catholic or even discovered that God does indeed exist. In the early years of our marriage, Tom turned me on to science historian James Burke's television series Connections and The Day the Universe Changed. At the time, the big science worry was the depletion of the ozone layer. I will never forget the mingled sense of relief and revelation that struck me as he calmly pointed out the many ways that we could continue to survive easily should such a thing occur ... with current technology. He went on to point out that many of our brightest minds would be busily working away on new inventions to solve both the problem and subsequent results. I felt a renewed optimism. "Why," I wondered, "had no one ever pointed this out to me before?"

We won't go into the various failures of news media on this point.

I just know that we have a spirit of pessimism these days. My grandparents enthusiastically hailed new inventions, even if it was just putting Tang, the breakfast of astronauts (!) on the table. The comparison between their view and that generally held these days is heartbreaking.

Now for the spoiler. Hopefully you've read the editorial in full.

I am pleased to see that there are still places where we can find proper perspective in national media.

The real answer, of course, is to have a little more faith in the creative powers of human beings. Given the freedom to grow and innovate, surely the same people who have licked polio, sent a man to the moon, and given us a revolution in information will sooner or later come up with new technologies that will provide for our energy needs while being friendlier to the environment.

The task is not without its challenges. But we’re not likely to get far with a “science” that defines the problem as American babies.

I turned to Tom yesterday morning and said ... (updated)

... "so now our air conditioner is broken and it's going to be 100 degrees today, my mother's got some old problems resurfacing, my father's health has taken a little downward slant, our Wall Street Journal wasn't delivered, our puppy has begun defecating on the patio again, and I couldn't sleep for three hours in the middle of the night ... again. Really? NOW is when we get all this? That's the best The Enemy can do? Now he's punishing us afterward?"

Tom laughed and nodded and said, "No kidding."

Let us add that yesterday afternoon we discovered that we may have to get a new furnace. Of course, that is a several thousand dollar investment which eventually comes to every long time home owner but the timing now is particularly bad. Of course.

And Rose had about 12 friends coming over for marathon movie watching and a friend's birthday celebration. (Never have I appreciated more the fact that our back room [where the television is] gets so little air conditioning that we have long had a little window unit. Let us thank God for hidden blessings. That was the one tolerable room in the house.)

Hey. At least I remembered to call my mother on Sunday and wish her happy birthday. I'll take the good where I can find it.

I sent some of this out in an email to the retreat team and had several people emailing back their experiences of backlash also.

We are used to taking hits from the very displeased Enemy before the retreat. Not just us, of course, but the entire team finds life is suddenly filled up and overflowing with troubles of many sorts before a retreat. We have learned to take it as a compliment, email each other that we are going to have "the best retreat ever," pray more than ever, and keep on going.

However, this is the first time that we've been hit so hard afterward.

Maybe it is a backlash of frustration. It does feel rather petulant.

There is no doubt that much good was worked by God through this retreat for the couples. In fact, there were even reports of a miracle or two.

I felt all weekend as if we were under a web of protection. Not the best way to put it perhaps. I could say "web" but to me there were no holes, it was a solid crystal sphere over us. As if angels were surrounding us, holding their wings out to keep anything external from entering the retreat. There was definitely more than one visible sign of God's love and power for us all.

You know what? If that's the price it takes, then I'm happy to take one for the team. Bring it.

Update:
Should have mentioned this sooner. This is just giving me more to offer up. So it's like a double whammy of "why bother?" Seriously. Do I need to point this out? Although smart isn't always what I hear applied to the Enemy.

Divorce Entrance Dance

You may find this spoof of the wedding dance video amusing. I know that I did. Via Kiwi Nomad.

The Senate Doctors' Show

Senator John Barrasso, M.D., and Senator Tom Coburn, M.D., are seeking your questions as Congress debates health care reform. We want you to be a part of this important debate. Send us your questions and comments by e-mail, Facebook, YouTube, or Twitter. Senators Barrasso and Coburn will respond to some of them in future episodes, which air every Tuesday and Thursday at 5 pm EST.

Fascinating. See their page with all past show links here.

Thanks to Terry for this, who as someone in the health biz knows a thing or two ... and also points out, "Sen. Coburn's bill deserves to be heard."

Thank you for your prayers

Victorian Couple Hand Tinted Photograph
via Victorian Paintings

The Beyond Cana retreat was really great. Eleven couples went away glowing with renewed love and their plans for improved marriages.

The experience of presenting the retreat is rewarding for us in so many ways. I am always reminded of how much I love the other couples on the team and how rewarding it is seeing their marriages grow richer. Also, I look at how many of them have young children and what they sacrifice in order to give to these other couples. It is a sacrifice that we don't have to make since our children are so much older ... and a real life example of how God takes it all and benefits both the giver and receiver. It keeps Tom and me grounded as well. The whole thing is a gift.

Many thanks to all who supported us in prayer. That support is essential and we appreciate it so much!

I finally watched that dancing wedding video that everyone has been linking to and talking about

(One last thing before I duck out for Beyond Cana.)

You know the video I mean, I am sure.

I very much fear that I must concur with the dear late queen on this subject.

"We are not amused."

One might rather say that we are actually appalled, although it might perhaps been a fine entrance to the ballroom for one's celebration after the nuptial ceremony. However, as a prequel to the sacrament of marriage, we would eschew such a demonstration in favor of keeping the focus on the sacrament that the couple is about to bestow upon each other. In these occasions, less is more.

Cheers,
QV and HC

Gone Retreatin' (and preppin')

Tomorrow our parish's Beyond Cana marriage enrichment retreat begins. Tom and I are heavily involved in several aspects of this, both preparatory and presentational. I'll be out of touch until Monday or possibly Tuesday, depending on work, home, and everything.

For those who have sent me an email in the last couple of weeks to which I have not responded, I apologize. Vacation and retreat preparation have taken their toll. I will be linking and responding next week. Promise!

Any prayers offered for the success of the retreat will be much appreciated by everyone involved. Thanks y'all!