36 Years of Wedded Bliss

We can tell what doesn't work in marriages. So often today people ask, "Who will make me happy?" But what we should ask is, "Who will I love so much that I will sacrifice myself to make them happy?"

Father Roch Kereszty

Dear, even-tempered Tom is truly my soul mate. I'm so very lucky that he loves me as much as I love him. He has taught me so much over the years about music, about thinking, about humor, about originality, about kindness and consideration. Not because he actively taught me but just by being around him. That in itself tells you a lot about the sort of person Tom is.

It's wonderful having spent 36 years with someone. You know each other's references (jokes become real one-liners), you understand each other's moods, and it is a deep, restful relationship that is not without delightful times of surprise and passion.

I've said this before (as the comments will attest). But this year saw significant changes for us as a couple and as householders. Although she is such a part of our family now that I can't imagine life any other way, my mother came to live with us just last September. We were excited to have her move in but there's no denying it was a big adjustment, especially for Mom — she appreciates Bollywood movies now much more than we ever could have hoped.

Of course, we can't ignore the surreal change of life with Covid-19 and all the uncertainties that involves — swirling statistics with continual reinterpretations, quarantine, toilet paper shortages, three adults working from home (oh, wait, we already did that part of it). Oh no — we realized we are in the "danger" age group. The lower end, to be sure, but it was still a mental shock. Who better to help get through all this than the person who knows and loves you better than anyone else? Not that we could ever have dreamed of facing such strangeness when we married.

And there will be more changes to come as we await the arrival of our first grandchild in November! It's a wonderful world out there and I'm so glad to have Tom to experience it with.