FUMA Reports Pittsburgh Unprepared for Zombies

"When it comes to defending ourselves against an army of reanimated human corpses, the officials in charge have fallen asleep at the wheel," Murphy said. "Who's in charge of sweep-and-burn missions to clear out infected areas? Who's going to guard the cemeteries at night? If zombies were to arrive in the city tomorrow, we'd all be roaming the earth in search of human brains by Friday."

Government-conducted zombie-attack scenarios described on the State Department's website indicate that a successful, citywide zombie takeover would take 10 days, but according to ZPI statistician Dr. Milton Cornelius, the government's models fail to incorporate such factors as the zombies' rudimentary reasoning skills and basic tool use.

"Today's zombies quickly learn to open doors, break windows, and stage ambushes," Cornelius said. "In one 1985 incident in Louisville, a band of zombies was able to lure four paramedics and countless law-enforcement officials to their deaths by commandeering an ambulance radio and calling for backup."

Read the whole story at The Onion who is doing their darndest to keep up with current Halloween news.

I'm Not a Baseball Fan Usually

But when the Astros are so close to getting into the World Series for the first time ever, my Texan pride overcomes all other prejudices!

And I am not alone in this sudden passion.

Halloween Countdown

For the ultimate superhero costume, I don't think you could improve on these.

Thanks to Tim for the heads up on this great site.

So, Mom, If I Wanted to Get a Job...

Isn't that every parent's dream? To have those words come from their child without a lot of prompting?

Hannah said she was interested in working at Boston Market. Having put in a stint during college at Pizza Hut my conviction is that every person should do time (and, yes, I meant do time) at a restaurant chain. It is how you become quite convinced that you must go to college and get a different sort of job.

Actually, any job involving service with the public will do in that capacity.

Later Tom said, "I wonder why she suddenly wants to get a job?"

I blithely replied, "Oh, she's been saying for a long time that when she gets her driver's license she'll need to work to help pay for insurance." We never have made that stipulation but she has many friends who have to do so. (That's Saint Hannah, right? Oh a mother's naivete.)

Yesterday on the way home from school, Hannah looked at me sidelong and said, tentatively, "So, if I got that job ... could I go to Europe this summer?"

AHA!

So much for those noble, lofty reasons I had. I told her about our conversation and she quickly said, "Oh ... of course ... that too!"

Right.

We were just happy to see that she thought she'd be comfortable spending three weeks with another family in Greece, Italy, France, and Ireland.

Hey, if I get an extra job do you think they'd take me?

The Anchoress Comes Out Swinging in Defense of Halloween

The Anchoress is standing up for the holiday people love to bash. Fantastic writing, as always, and you've got to go see the Invisible Monk costumes her boys had one year. Those may be the best costumes I've ever seen. EVER!

C'mon, Everybody, Sing Along!

What better fate,
To populate...

(clap clap clap clap)

Deep in the heart of Texas?

Get in the groove,
It’s time to move...

(clap clap clap clap)

Deep in the heart of Texas!

Screw doom and gloom,
There’s always room...

(clap clap clap clap)

Deep in the heart of Texas!

No need to toil,
(there’s so much oil...)

(clap clap clap clap)

Deep in the heart of Texas!

The numbers show,
There’s room to grow...

(clap clap clap clap)

Deep in the heart of Texas!

With much aplomb,
I thank you, Dom,

(clap clap clap clap)

Here in the heart of...Boston.

Kelly Clark
(in response to Dom's post about overpopulation)

St. Luke

MEMORIAL

St. Luke is Tom's patron saint. He says that he chose him because he was the only apostle who never saw Jesus. I like that sign of faith from Tom to identify with Luke that way. Certainly if we remember that detail then St. Luke's accomplishments become those that we can admire even more as a Christian who fully lives his faith.

St. Luke wrote the gospel that shows us so clearly divine mercy, gives us many details about Mary and the birth of Jesus, tells stories of women that no one else mentions, and gives us some unique parables such as my favorite The Prodigal Son. His medical training let him include many small details that otherwise might have gone unnoticed, such as in the story of the woman whose bleeding stopped after she touched the tassel of Jesus' robe.

His gospel and the book of Acts were written to someone who had converted. Luke wrote them not for himself but to help others and, in so doing, was used by God to leave a legacy of faith that helps us all today.

They say that he also was an artist who painted portraits of Mary. I like to think of him painting Mary while she perhaps told him stories of Jesus, of how she pondered things in her heart.

Most of all today, I am struck by the thing that was pointed out when I was reading Word Among Us' reflection for the day about today's Mass readings.

Only Luke is with me.
2 Timothy 4:11

Everyone left Paul except Luke. Luke was a devoted friend who knew how to show it when the chips were down, even if it meant danger to himself.

Surely Luke has left us much to admire but also much to attempt to emulate. Complete faithfulness to God, keeping our commitments, going the extra mile even when it wasn't easy, using every bit of ourselves in service.

St. Luke, pray for us.

(For more information about St. Luke look here.)

A Good Definition of Faith

For the pastor at the Byzantium Catholic Church who said he didn't know what faith was and if anyone had a good definition to let him know (as reported by TSO).

Faith is to believe what you do not see; the reward of this faith is to see what you believe.

Saint Augustine

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen…

St. Paul, Hebrews 11:1

If our priest said this I'd start worrying about everything else he said. It seems to me that someone who doesn't have at least an inkling of how they define faith is living an unexamined life. Way too unexamined on a very basic level to be giving the homily and telling everyone else how to live. At the very least, such a person is living a life without having read (every very cursorily) the classic Church Fathers...or certain parts of the Bible. Scary.

Weekend Reflection

Sin is the executioner of the good God, and the assassin of the soul. It snatches us away from Heaven to precipitate us into Hell. And we love it!
St. John Vianney

How is it, Lord, that we are cowards in everything save in opposing Thee?

St. Teresa of Avila

All In God's Time

Last night we toasted to Ed's life, circled 'round the bed. His wife put a drop of his favorite single malt scotch (The Macallan) on his lips. At that, he raised the corner of his mouth in the way he always did when he grinned mischievously, then moved his tongue side-to-side to indicate he was there with us, enjoying the moment - and the whisky. That was a huge effort on his part, but there was no ambiguity. He was still there - a small, low pilot light.

Kobayashi Maru shares the three day vigil held with his brother, Ed, as he departed this world. It is a quietly powerful and moving story, one that I am not ashamed to say moved me to tears.

Ed was granted the gift of the "good death" that the old prayers to Jesus, Mary, and Joseph ask for. Surrounded by his loving family, allowed to go in God's time, while his family was blessed with the knowledge of God's love. As KM says, "God's purpose. God's plan. Goodness through hardship. Purpose through broken things." We know he wanted to stay, oh so badly. But since he had to go, what a way to do it. May we all be as blessed as Ed when our time comes.

Eternal peace grant to Ed, O Lord, and peace to his family.

I Had No Idea

I have heard about the Middle Eastern Christian martyrs and the Chinese Catholic Underground, but I am one of those who Crisis publisher Brian Saint-Paul mentions ... I had no idea about this situation. With that in mind, I am reprinting his entire email letter below.

A Religious Upheaval In India... And What It Means For Catholicism

Crisis Magazine e-Letter
October 13, 2005

Dear Friend,
Devidas Sabane was a diligent farmer, working the land of a former member of the Indian parliament. When his son fell ill, the impoverished Sabane went to the landowner's brother to request money for his treatment. The brother wasn't in a giving mood. He beat Sabane viciously and forced poison down his throat. The farmer died later that day. When his bereaved wife reported the murder to the police and the State Human Rights Commission, they brushed her off. She later committed suicide.

This is India today. The account -- one among many -- comes from the testimony of Indira Athwale, given last week before the United States Committee on International Relations. You see, the Sabanes weren't just Indians, they were Untouchable.

India is made up of a caste system, a construct of its Hindu heritage. At the top are the Brahmins -- the priestly class. Below them are the Kshatriyas, then the Vaisyas, and finally the Sudras.

There's another group that hasn't even merited a place on the Indian social ladder: the Dalit, otherwise known as the Untouchables. Life as an Untouchable is devastating. They're held in contempt by other members of society, are relegated to the most menial of jobs, and even physical contact with them is thought to bring contamination (requiring special purification rituals to cleanse the higher caste member). Their women are raped without retribution, and their men beaten and killed without justice.

While discrimination against the 250 million Dalit is officially prohibited in the Indian constitution, it continues unabated. That they make up almost 1/3 of the country's population is irrelevant. They're Untouchable and have no voice.

But now, something is happening among the Dalit... and it may have effects on the religious future of the country.

You see, after centuries of shameful oppression by their fellow Hindus, the Untouchables are starting to move away from the religion. Initially, there were large Dalit conversions to Buddhism. But the attractions of that faith are proving limited.

And so now, two religions are receiving attention and a growing number of Dalit converts: Christianity and Islam. The possibilities here are striking.

I spoke Friday with Betsy Vigneri, a media consultant with the Dalit Freedom Network, and she told me the shift began in the late 1990s. "It was a culmination of things," she said. "The world moved toward globalization, technology, and communication. Suddenly, some of the educated Dalits were able to see what was happening in the outside world. They realized they could tell their story to a global audience. That's when they organized and began to look for ways to help themselves. They also realized that the best way to find relief from this victimization -- from this slavery -- is to quit Hinduism and embrace another religion."

The transition wasn't easy at first. "Originally, the Christian churches were also practicing the caste system. But now, they're working for freedom of conscience in religion. They're there to serve -- the same approach Mother Teresa took. In their service, they're trying to demonstrate the love of Christ."

While the Muslims are making every effort to convert the Untouchables, the Christian churches have an advantage: the person of Christ. "I've found that when Dalits hear about Jesus, they're deeply moved to learn that He loves them," Vigneri said. "All their lives, they've been told how horrible they are. But they hear that Jesus not only loves them but died for them. In their minds, He reached out to the Untouchables of His day. Touched them... talked to them... ate with them... These are all forbidden for a higher caste person to do with the Dalits."

But Islam itself is not without its own attractions. When an Untouchable becomes Muslim, the female converts are protected by the Muslim men from the harassment of the Hindus. This is no small thing, since Dalit women are in frequent danger of assault and rape.

On the other hand, there are aspects of Islam that some Untouchables find disconcerting. Vigneri noted that "there are Dalit men who have seen how some Muslim men treat their wives or view women. They don't want that for their wives and daughters."

While Muslim and Christian leaders in India have had fairly cordial relations thus far, there is real concern that if India turns Islamic, they could impose Sharia law on everyone. Given the experience of non-Muslims in other such states, that could mean an entirely new form of oppression.

Vigneri told me that there are a few things Christians in the West can do to help the Untouchables -- both in their fight against their horrific living conditions and in their spiritual journey:

1. Spread the word about what's going on in India. "So many Christians tell us, 'I had no idea this was happening.' The Dalits want us to tell the world what they're going through. This is very humbling. We tend to think people want creature comforts. But the Dalits want their stories told."


2. Pray. "The first thing Christian Dalits ask for is prayer. These people have nothing, but they know the power of prayer."


3. Stay informed. One of the best ways to keep yourself up-to-date on the struggles of the Untouchables is to visit the Dalit Freedom Network.

India is at a religious crossroads. Within one generation, we'll see some kind of radical shift in the spiritual makeup of that rising nation. Will it become the next bright light for Christianity, or might it join other jihadist states in violence and oppression? Time will tell.

We in the United States tend to live in a self-enclosed world. That's the stereotype of Americans, and that stereotype is too often true (and I'm as guilty as anyone). But as Catholics, we have a spiritual obligation to care for all the world's suffering. By adding the plight of the Dalits to your own prayer intentions and by telling their story, you'll help them in this world and the next.

All the best,

Brian

National Clandestine Service? "Jose"? Is This A Joke?

Because these names sound like something that they'd use for a Saturday Night Live skit.

The U.S. Central Intelligence Agency has announced the creation of a new service to oversee human intelligence, meaning information gathered through people rather than electronic sources, among all federal agencies working in that field.

Officials said Thursday that the director of the new National Clandestine Service will be an agent known only as "Jose" because he remains undercover. He is currently head of the CIA's clandestine unit.

Read the whole story here.

An Experience of Angels

Therese Z. shares an experience she had of "hearing" an angel. It is a simple and yet very powerful story.

She then asks if anybody else has had a similar experience. What sprang to mind does not have to do with angels or a direct communication. However, her reaction as "sort of serenely nonplussed" sparked a memory that I share with my dear friend Stevie.

I was in Adoration at the beginning of a CRHP retreat. A woman was there who was praying with others before going in to tell her story to the group. When it was time to go, she walked by me and I felt a "WHOOSH" hit me in the face. It left me disoriented for a few seconds. Oddly enough I simply thought, "That must be the Holy Spirit" and then returned to prayer. I didn't even think about it again until Stevie, who had been in Adoration at the same time, told me that she had "felt" the Holy Spirit go by when the woman left the room. Suddenly I remembered that "WHOOSH." Truly it must have been the Holy Spirit passing by.

Romantic Tip

Yet Two More

There are two kinds of people in the world:

Object People and Experience People

Object People see love symbolized in gifts, in things: Roses, jewelry, socket wrench sets. Experience people see love expressed in time spent together, in experiences: Dinner, movies, bowling. Neither is better than the other, they're just personal preferences. And, interestingly, neither preference is related to gender.

Why do you need to know this? Because if your partner is an Object Person, and you take her to the best restaurant in town and drop $200 on an elegant experience, she'll still be expecting a gift at the end of the evening. She's not being selfish, she's simply being herself.

Object People love items that have special meaning. Experience People love activities that create special memories.

1001 Ways to Be Romantic

I never really have thought about this one (perhaps one reason I need this book?) but believe that we are both experience people. Don't get me wrong, gifts are nice too, but not at all in the same way.

Something Beautiful is Happening

Be sure to read the 6:45 p.m. update at Kobayashi Maru's as they sit in vigil with his brother who is dying. It is very sad but very holy also. KM is sharing a treasure with us.

INTO Your hands, O Lord, I commend my spirit. O Lord Jesus Christ, receive my spirit. Holy Mary, pray for me. O Mary, mother of grace, mother of mercy, ...protect me from the enemy, and receive me at the hour of death. St. Joseph, pray for me. St. Joseph, in company with the Blessed Virgin, Your spouse, open to me the [source] of divine mercy.

Jesus, Mary and Joseph, I give you my heart and my soul.

Jesus, Mary and Joseph, assist me in my last agony [or in my last moment].

Jesus, Mary and Joseph, may I sleep and rest in peace in your holy company.

Lord hear our prayer.

Prayers Requested for This Family

At various points throughout the day, I've played DJ, putting on various CDs that my brother likes. If there's beauty to be found in dying, we've found enough today to go on one more step... one more hour... one more breath. We hold each other close in love.

Kobayashi Maru's brother is going home. Pray for him and his family, for their peace and strength in this hard time. Lord hear our prayer.

"Offer It Up." What the Heck Does That Mean?

Jennifer asks what the phrase, "offer it up" means (mentioned in this post). I can understand her question entirely because it certainly mystified me when I first heard it my mother-in-law say it many years ago. She was counseling one of our daughters to "offer up" her annoyance at something. I think that her explanation is the simplest, and therefore possibly the best, that I have ever heard.

It means to offer your suffering to God as a sacrifice.

You can do this with a specific intention. This can be done with small things annoyances (as I did with that woman behind me in line last night in the long, long pharmacy line who was talking so loudly on her cell phone that I couldn't hear the pharmacist when I finally had my turn with him) as well as large (my last root canal!). I often am reminded on a fast day that the hunger I am feeling is perhaps the same hunger that my parents' souls feel without any belief in God, so I will offer my hunger to God as a sacrifice for their conversion. You also can offer it up without any intention at all and give it to God to use as He will. Not only does this put our suffering to good use but, from my own point of view, it certainly gives one a better perspective on putting up with that particular suffering or annoyance.

As the excerpt in the previous post mentions, the point of this is not to be a "victim" but to make a joyful offering.

This post, Holy Mass and Personal Self Sacrifice, also sheds some light on the idea of offering suffering to God.

Romantic Tip 497

Two

There are two kinds of people in the world:

Detail People and Overview People

Detail People focus on the little things; they notice everything. Overview People focus on the big picture; they see general trends. Neither is right or wrong, these are simply character tendencies.

It will be much easier for you to pull romantic surprises if you're a Detail Person and your loved one is an Overview Person. Detail People are good at covering their trail, paying attention to the little things, and acting "normal." The overview partner won't even notice any little slips.

If you're the Overview Person, you'll need to be extra careful when planning surprises. Those detail-oriented partners will notice every unusual phone call, every little chance in your schedule, and that mischievous look on your face!

1001 Ways to Be Romantic

Me? Details, details, details. Tom won't even let me nudge a gift box to one side, having learned the hard way that I am a really good guesser.

The Eucharist as a Sacrifice

As we participate in the Eucharist, not only do we participate in Christ's sacrifice on Calvary but we are called to share in that sacrifice. Just knowing this should change how we view everything that irks us at Mass. Are you:

• Suffering mental anguish -- like a crown of thorns is weighted upon your head?
• Weighed down by worldly concerns -- like the weight of the cross is on you?
• Feeling powerless -- like you are nailed to a cross?

If we take away a sacrificial attitude toward the Eucharist, we are likely to fail to see the connection between our lives and what we do at Mass. We are apt to sit in judgment, waiting to be entertained (whether we are conservative or liberal, what we want to see differs but the attitude is the same). When we fail to bring a sacrificial attitude to the Eucharist, our participation seems at times to be modeled more after Herod's banquet, where Simone's dance cost the Baptist his head, than after the Last Supper of Our Lord, where there was every indication that partaking in this banquet was likely to cost the disciples their own lives. (Indeed, ten of the twelve were martyred, Judas took his own life, and John survived being boiled alive in a cauldron of oil.) ...

Participation in the Eucharist requires that we die to ourselves and live in Christ. If we want to get the most out of the Eucharist, then sacrifice is the key. This is what has been lost on many of us and if we want to reclaim all the spiritual riches that are available to us we must relearn what it means not only to "offer it up" but indeed to offer ourselves up.

Now I want to be clear that what I am proposing in this book is not the "victim-ism" that was sometimes prevalent in the older spirituality of "offering it up." In every situation we are free to choose how we will respond to an event: we can blame someone else for what is happening, or we can feel powerless and do nothing. It is my contention that neither of these responses is Christ-like. The experience of "offering up" our lives to God needs to be a positive and co-redemptive act. Thankfully, with God's help we are all capable of freely choosing to respond in this fashion.

How to Get the Most Out of the Eucharist
by Michael Dubruiel

Resource Spotlight

CATHOLIC CULTURE: LITURGICAL YEAR
Catholic Culture has a lot of good resources but the one that I really use consistently is their daily liturgical page. Each one has the Church's saint of the day, along with the saint of the day according to the old calendar which is sometimes quite enlightening. Along with extra links for more information, each saint has a "Things to Do" list at the bottom which have all sorts of different applications to daily life: recipes, crafts, links to more reading, and really good suggestions for ways to relate to the virtues of each saint.

There also is always an overview page for the month as well as one for the liturgical season that the Church is in at that time.